A Series of Play and Musical Ideas

So, my new thing is brain storming play and musical ideas. Some of you may have seen my ideas on Facebook or Twitter. Regardless, I'm getting really good at it. In fact, my numbers and research are consistently leading me to be certain I can make triple figures at a minimum on any of my masterpieces.

Some actors have already stepped forward and told me they were interested (i.e. Tim Allen). U2 has expressed strong interest in composing music for many of my plays/musicals. In addition, my contacts with Stephen Sondheim reported he is looking to turn a couple of my plays into musicals, likely children's musicals. Monster is going to sponsor all my productions.

Here are the plays and musicals I'm writing:

• I'm going to write a play about a high school basketball star who loses his parents in a fatal car accident as they were on their way to go see "Lorax." The plot twist will be that the parents never actually died. "Lorax" was just so bad that the parents faked their death and abandoned their only son. The son grows up to be the native kid, Mimi-Siku, from "Jungle 2 Jungle."

• I'm going to write a play about one of the characters from "Swamp People," who every night, after killing tons of gators, goes home and records a pretend radio talk show. Eventually, the show is picked up and developed by MTV and becomes a hit music video show. The character turns out to be Carson Daly.

• I'm going to write a children's musical about a blind waitress at Red Robin who aspires to be a gold medal skeet shooter at the Summer Olympics after discovering she is distantly related to the famous American sharpshooter and cowgirl, Annie Oakley. The blind girl dies of tuberculosis before accomplishing anything.

• I'm going to write a play about a basketball coach at a technical college in Montana who is forced to live out the rest of his life in a wheelchair after suffering a spinal cord injury from his iPad 3 while trying to get his team into the NCAA Tournament. He sues Apple, who settles the case outside of court. In exchange, the coach gets cheetah legs with Bluetooth capabilities and sets the American 100m Dash record in the 1998 Olympic Games but is later disqualified, because he illegally downloaded "Mean Girls" on his iPad. He has to return his cheetah legs and his gold medal. He now is an assistant Men's Basketball coach at UWGB. The cheetah legs are up for auction on ebay.

• I'm going to write a play about a 17-year-old girl who's really into barbers but her Catholic parents want her to marry a hair-stylist.

I can already taste the success and women.